Friday, August 14, 2009


Relationship envy. Its where there is someone who is jealous of another person's relationship.

I have been a victim of someone relationship envying me on several occassions. Thats is my most of the time I am private of my "relationship/love" life. Because once too many people know your buisness...someone out there is expecting your relationship to fail.

People listen to too many people. Too many people been hurt thus alot of "relationship-haters". I can't say I haven't been jealous of a couple of people or so because I have...especially if I am single, but I dont have "envy". I never wish for a happy couple to break up.

If I see someone talk about their love life and they sound like they are truly happy...I am happy for them. Sincerely. Because I would want someone to be happy for me.

But that is not the case. I never brag about my relationship life ever. I mean some people thought some way of one of my longest relationships of 3 years because of how long we were together...but ultimately we broke up because he listened to people who had "relationship envy".

"Why are you still with her"? "Have you cheated on her yet"? "When in the hell are you gonna get married"? "how can you be with the same person for that long"? All of that and if you hear too much of that on a regular basis, all of the negative nonsense it will take a toll on your relationship if you let it.

I have had it with my friends too with me. "Oh you still with him"? "Oh I guess you can't go out because you boo'd up with such and such"... "I dont want to hear about [person name]" "OMG you guys make me sick" "He is probably cheating on you." "I really dont care for him" all of that...and more!

After awhile I just tune people out. Talk Talk Talk about my love life all day. You dont know what we go though. You dont know our real happy moments. Hell you dont know our real issues and if we do have issues then that is for us to resolve them.

I dont even like getting advice from people sometimes because people always think the best advice is "Why dont you leave such and such alone" "Men are dogs...blah blah blah". I on the hand just keep it moving.

I didnt realize how private I was with my life until like 2 of my friends as of this week just asked me about something and they was like "Forreal? I didnt not know that!" Dang people are so late, but I kind of like that. I feel how Beyonce feels about Jay-Z now. Nobody knows my issues so whether they are resolved or not, people still do not know.

People should envy...and I am about to get deeper than this. The lesson is not complete yet.

Pt.2 coming "real" soon

Thursday, August 13, 2009


"So what I tend to do is to think of today as the past,It's funny when you comin' in first but you hope that you last,You just hope that it last..." - Lust for Life by Drake

Lust. Wouldn't it be nice to lust for life?

As defined it is have a craving, appetite, or great desire for; mostly sexual desire

I love being in lust. Its a crazy feeling. We all lust, it all starts at a young age and you "crush" on somebody. Wanting someone, daydreaming of the day you and that person will get together...if you ever get together...

Crushes are cute. But they suck. Most of the time you have a crush as a child/teen you never really talk to that person, alot of blushing, alot of games, alot of silence, most of all alot of fantasy.
Most crushes dreams never get fulfilled so when you become an adult you upgrade to Lust.

Adults can lust over crushing because their tends to be alot more action. You can playful flirt, tease, or actual get to it [whatever that means to you ::wink::]. Another thing about lust is that the emotions that are involved in it.

When you mutually lust for a person there are so many emotions. It the moment it could be heighten attraction & alot of sexual tension. The feeling is great. You feel special. You feel like your on cloud 9 because two parties engage in a series of lustful events.

The way the person looks at you. The way the person talks to you. The way the person touches you. The way the person just is...can drive you crazy! But there is a bad part. Lust can be get that heightened attraction and then after the lustful episodes are over...their could be stagnant emotions as well. Confusion...

Yeah its fun to lust for awhile...but sometimes lust is unfulfilling. Your fufilling a temporary release. That is why Love will always be more powerful than lust. Yes love is more painful than lust, but the sensations are stronger. You can lust more than one person at a time, where love is just for one special person and no one can come close to that.

I see why so many people rather lust than love though. Its less drama and feelings do not get damaged as bad. You can almost just move on and lust for your next victim. But again...that just fills a temporary feeling. Lust is actually superfical [Read my superfical post here]. Superfical is not just scratches the surface.

Lust is fun but love is fulfilling. I rather Love for life (if that is possible).

Learn: Why lust for life when you can love beyond an eternity? Lust doesn't last...but love can.

Lust for Life- Drake

Friday, August 7, 2009

Superficial Vs. Real

This is a very serious subject because I think people are getting twisted what is superfical and what is real.

Superfical are things that are fabricated, temporary, artificial, counterfeit, imitation, sugar-coated...AKA FAKE!

Here are is the definition of the term superficial: being or affecting or concerned with a surface; not deep or penetrating emotionally or intellectually

I think alot of us do things for superfical reasons. Yes you buy expensive things because it make you feel good and others envy you. But deep down inside does the material possession it make you who you are?

People go around have have wreckless sex because it feels good. But afterwards are you sincerly emotionally invested in that person?

We do things again for instant gratification! Half of the things we do are for temporary relief. No lasting results...It makes you happy now, bores you later.

Here is a superfical materialistic example: Soujah Boy getting a diamond encrusted lamborgini chain that has a match remoting controller to turn it into a remote controlled battery operated-chain. WTF?

T-Pain's BIG ASS CHAIN! So what is their point? There is no real point, just to carelessly flash money and throw it in people's faces. I guess they want that powerfully feeling for other's to ENVY them. I guess...

Superfical feelings: You date people for the sake of not being lonely. You date someone for the sake they have a nice car. You date a girl because she has a big butt. Thye sexually turn you on. They freely spend money on you. You get high off of the attention from others. Superfical Bullish!

People do alot of superfical things for selfish reason. Tell people nonsense to get their way. Boost someone's ego. Do things to boost their own ego. Its so dumb because its an empty escape. Because when you all alone in a room with no one watching you, no one to keep you company do you think about what truely matters in life? Are you in-tune with your feelings?

When you buy something, is it something you needed. Is it something that has a meaning to it? Is it something you will use for years to come? Did you save money for it and appeciate the purchase?

When you connect with people do you have real emotions for this person? It is a happy feeling?Does this person benefit you in a good way? If you date someone do you feel real sparks beside sexual intent? Is it a true connection?

I hate superficial things. I hate superfical people. Sure I know I fall victim of the superfical things in life...but lately I see myself gravating and focusing on whats real. If it is superficial I do not waste too much time with it. It will entertain me for a second and I will let it go. I dont invest my feeling of money into it unless in the long run it is going to do some good. Why is that so hard for people to see?

Learn: To regonize when you are drinking concentrated juice instead of 100% real fruit juice. When it is watered down you wont be about to taste the real thing.